The Journey of Lifelong Coaching for Me too?!?! Seriously?!?!
You've Got This, Jedi: Embracing Feedback and Coaching on the Path to Greatness
We all know how feedback can sting, right? We usually want to hear the good stuff, but it's the bad stuff that we really need to hear. It hurts, but just like everything else in life that feels like a struggle, it's the only way to grow. Hearing not just what we want to hear but what we need to hear helps us take off those blinders our brain puts up to keep us safe. I’ve learned to intentionally say, “… thank you for being brave enough to tell me what I need to hear.”
I’ve just had an invigorating coaching session with my mindset accountability friend and partner, Elle Adda. I like to call her my coach because she helps me re-remember who I am and reinstall my values and mindset in the safe space she provides, filled with no judgment, patience, and a touch of humor that we've developed over the years.
To me, coaching is about allowing oneself to be vulnerable again. It’s about opening up and letting a trusted friend come in behind the curtains to help refine your vision and realign with your ultimate goals. With Elle’s guidance and through a short hour session, I’ve reinvigorated my why and sharpened my purpose and values. Let me share this with you in hopes it may inspire you to find your own as well.
My Why: To hold space for my tribe—to enable discovery and the courage to answer your Call-To-Adventure in a fun and engaging way. To inspire through my research, my being, and sharing. To be the safe space that allows us to grow, build confidence, and flourish together. (Sounds so Mum, but I was trying for Big-Sister 🤣)
To Re-remember: Surrender and trust mean that when I let go, the answers will come. Faith is knowing that it is and has always been within me—I am way more than enough. It is only when I try to control things that I cannot hear it through the noise. But in faith, I can let go, knowing that I can trust myself and my children. I believe that if we trust, we will eventually grow into who we were meant to be. Trust in Divine timing, allowing space for worry and control because it's trying to protect me. But there is nothing to prove, nothing to conquer, nothing to defend. You've got this, Jedi!
Action Steps: So now, make the plan and let it go. Do the work just for the work, make it a practice so it doesn’t feel like work.
The Vision Beyond the Vision: One day, you’ll go back to your first love of creation, write that book and make that film that impacts and changes the lives of many others without even touching them.
Remember who you are. I will remember who I am. You've got this, Jedi!
Reflecting on Atul Gawande's TED Talk, "Want to Get Great at Something? Get a Coach," I'm reminded of the crucial role of coaching in achieving excellence. Gawande, a renowned surgeon, shares his personal experience of hiring a coach to observe and provide feedback on his surgical techniques. Despite his initial skepticism, he discovered that having a coach significantly improved his performance. One key insight from Gawande's talk is that coaches act as external eyes and ears, providing a more accurate picture of reality. They help break down complex actions into fundamental components, enabling individuals to rebuild and refine their skills effectively.
Gawande puts it simply, "It's not how good you are now; it's how good you're going to be that really matters." This reminds us that the journey of improvement is ongoing, and there is always room to grow.
Another voice that resonates with this idea is Carol Dweck, the author of "Mindset: The New Psychology of Success." Dweck's research highlights the importance of maintaining a growth mindset—the belief that our abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication and hard work.
Great leaders understand this and continuously seek new perspectives to keep their vision fresh and crisp. For example, Steve Jobs was known for his relentless pursuit of excellence and his willingness to seek feedback from a wide range of people, not just within his inner circle. This openness to feedback helped him stay innovative and forward-thinking.
Personally, I’ve found that embracing coaching has been a game-changer. It's not about admitting you're not good enough; it's about acknowledging that you want to be better. It’s about seeing through the eyes of those who care about us, holding space for ourselves to discover something new, and applying it to feel that sense of accomplishment and confidence. If nothing else, it's a deliberate approach to allowing yourself to see from a different perspective, mentally framing the experience as welcomed critique. Remember, confidence is stacked. It’s built from the outside in, supported by actions and the people around us.
Keep pushing forward, keep growing, and remember—you've got this, Jedi!